Swede Dreams. Recipe
Avocado and egg smørrebrød with hunters sausage and strawberries. Välsmakande! That's Swedish for tasty!
I have a secret love affair with Sweden. Okay, I guess it's not a secret anymore. Sweet, supple Sweden with it's quiet demeanor and tender, juicy meatballs. Just thinking about it makes me want to rub butter all over myself and... Oh you're still here. Hmm Where was I? Oh yes, Sweden is great. I have dreams of living in a small gothic castle off the coast of Gothenburg where I raise sheep and bats and make my own cheese. From the sheep, not the bats.
Ikea. I suppose we have to talk about it. I hate their furniture. Uncomfortable square sofas made of blonde press wood. No thanks. I will however take a trip to Ikea just to have Swedish meatballs while sitting in their depressing cafeteria. While sitting there enjoying my 'probably not the best introduction to Swedish food' meatballs I am blinded by the flickering 70,000 watt florescent light bulbs and surrounded by sad, bland people with their scores of screaming children. Anyways, once in a while I go there to buy candles or a cheap wooden spoon. Plus they carry a delicious brand of lingonberry preserves that go very well with the 100lb bag of frozen meatballs I've purchased.
My favorite rye crispbreads and my armpit. Enjoy.
Oh yeah. There's also ABBA or as I like to call them "The Devil". I just don't trust music that is so damn happy and on roller skates. Just hearing them makes me go into a fit of rage wanting to punch every blonde with a bowl cut in sight. When I live in my creepy castle I will have a moat filled with sharks and lions and spiders and broken glass. There with be a "No ABBA beyond this point" sign posted at the base of my driveway. Break this rule and it's into the shark lion spider glass pool with you. No exceptions.
Anyways, one of my favorite things to eat is Smørrebrød which is Swedish for open faced sandwiches. Just get yourself some dark rye breads or rye crisps (which are my favorite for the crunch). Slice an avocado. Drizzle a little garlic aioli (or this). Hard boil an egg and put that on there. Season with salt and pepper. Add a little hunters sausage if you like. Or perhaps some pickled herring. Maybe some lutfisk. Just kidding. I have nightmares about being forced to eat this rotten, see-through, gelatinous fish. I would rather drag splintered toothpicks and asbestos across my eyeballs than eat lutfisk. But yeah, you can pretty much put whatever you want on smørrebrød. Add some fruit on the side and you have a lovely little Swedish meal. Afterwards eat a whole bag of Swedish Fish candy. Yummmmy!
My mean, vicious cat guards the Swedish Fish. Gimme some candy you selfish, awful creature!